Although he may sound like a young Eminem, Asher Roth is no Slim Shady. But, despite the similarities, he's another white dude with mad lyrical skills and a raw/crude sense of humor who can hold his own, often poking fun at his nerdiness and upbringing. This video had me rolling. Warning kiddies: this has explicit lyrics, so please get your parents permission before viewing (or turn down the volume so they can't hear it). :) I posted the link off Loud.com, which has much better picture quality, but during playback on my site, it kept stopping and "loading," so if you have that problem, I added the one from You Tube. Side note: I had to use the link from You Tube to adjust the HTML embedding because the address off Loud's site was jacked up. I keep learning, so maybe one day I'll be able to program in HTML. Enjoy!
Fangoria's Weekend of Horrors aka Hunt for the Overzealous Cleavage and Camel Toe
First, a little explanation on the title of this. What started out as what I thought would be a normal, yet bigger horror convention, ended up being a cleavage and camel toe free for all. There were so many boobs popping out of tops, that it became a game between Heather and I on who could spot the most ridiculous. Not to mention, the chick policing the entry line had one of the biggest and most disgusting camel toes I'd seen, and I couldn't stop glancing at it. It's like her snapper was eating her pants, and this was the same all 3 days, in 3 different outfits. I told Heather maybe it was some type of security for her, or that she liked the feeling. (Heather, you have any pics I can add?) Anyway, I promised a recap of events from our jaunt to Chicago for Fangoria’s Weekend of Horrors, so here it is.
Nothing extremely exciting to mention about the convention itself, sure it was nice to see and meet Ruggero Deodato (Cannibal Holocaust), Lamberto Bava (Demons 1&2), and Sergio Stivaletti (Cemetary Man), but since most of their panel was done through a translator (they’re Italian), it took away from the excitement. We got to hear from the ever-so entertaining Lloyd Kaufman, Troma president, but it was all about his latest movie, Poultrygeist, and his new DVD, Direct Your Own Damn Movie. I’d seen him, Romero, Savini, and Doug Bradley (Pinhead) before, so no big news there. And, although Tom Savini had been labelled as an asshole from a prior convention, and did have an air of arrogance surrounding him while signing autographs (I got the Friday the 13th Blu Ray and his first movie, The Burning signed), he was light-hearted and semi-entertaining during his panel, which I missed the bulk of due to haggling over some DVDs I’d been eyeing all weekend, but didn’t want to pay full price for. But, I did get them, and at the price I wanted.
We got pretty much everyone’s autograph except Romero, whose line was continually a mile long, and I wasn’t waiting. I did get a chance to meet with Jerry from Synapse/Impulse Films, and we had a good conversation. I bought a t-shirt, and he ended up giving Heather a free one and some logoed lip balm. He told me they’re working on a colored t-shirt of the movie cover of Thriller: A Cruel Picture, which is one I was going to buy in black and white, but they didn’t have my size. So, I got his e-mail, and vowed to keep in touch.
At another booth, I kept eyeing this Friday the 13th oil painting, and bought a $10 print of it, but they weren’t willing to sell the original for what I was willing to pay. AND, they acted as if they were making me some great deal by selling it to me for the price they quoted me the day before, even though it seemed to raise 100 bucks overnight. Granted, it was one-of-a-kind, and would’ve been a sweet addition to the new pad, but times are hard, and I just couldn’t shell out the extra $50 in fear that it might get destroyed on the plane ride home. I’m really proud of myself, though, for standing my ground and not giving in, but damn, it was nice. So, instead, I bought a piece from a different artist (image not available), and Heather got one too (see pic below). Sadly, the frame got broken in her luggage coming home. Blasted American Airlines!! This isn’t the first time they’ve been careless and broken our shit.
For more pics, visit www.darksartparlour.com. You may also get a complimentary psychoanalysis of your relationships with purchase. (Just ask Heather or I if you're curious what that means).
I spent a little time talking to a few of the independent filmmakers, and bought some of their movies (gotta support the indies!), while plugging my site, the Side Show Review. But, I had to pass on a movie called Stiff Jobs from some dudes from St. Louis who thought their movie was the best and funniest film ever, and turned up their noses when I mentioned Eric Stanze (Scrapbook, China White Serpentine, Deadwood Park), a fellow St. Louisan filmmaker. Their movie looked so friggin cheesy that I couldn’t justify spending the money only to turn around and watch something that made the worst Troma movie look good. See for yourself, and if you made it all the way through the trailer, much less a full-length feature, you're a more tolerable person than me.
The weather was cold and rainy and the train rides were less than amusing, and as Heather pointed out, the blood-alcohol content of most Chicagoans must be pretty high, that is, at least for train riders, since several people wreaked of liqour or were drinking on there. I can’t fathom having to take that back and forth to work everyday, but hey, it’s a cheap and faster way of transpo, so pop in the headphones and away you go. We had Chicago-style pizza, which I think is actually deep dish, even though we had thin crust, and it sucked. I’d rather have had Papa Johns. A highlight was getting to hang out with my cousin, Susan, her husband, Aaron, their newborn, Lila, and dog, Sarah. It was a good time, even though I was a little perturbed when they wouldn’t watch the Lonely Island (Jizz In My Pants, Dick In a Box) and Jon Lajoie (Show Me Your Genitals) videos I brought up on You Tube.
We missed out on the Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Jeffery Combs panels due to our flight, which ended up getting pushed back twice, and we didn’t leave until like 8:30pm (vs 6:45). But, we probably didn't miss much since I’d seen Combs before, and Marilyn Burns looked like dead woman walking. Heather was a little pissed that there wasn't a Cinnabons, even though signs said there was, and we ended up eating at Wolfgang Puck's before seeing Macaroni Grill. Maybe next time. And, we ended up settling for Subway (where I learned that price haggling in Chicago is not only okay, but expected), when we could have had Chili's upon our arrival. But, in all, it was a pretty good time, and I think Heather had fun too. Our adventures in the airport inspired me to think about writing a blog on airport courtesy, and even though Heather says noone will listen, I may write it anyway. So, thanks to my cuz for housing us for the weekend, and maybe I’ll make it back next year. Another horror convention said and done, and now it’s onto the Texas Frightmare Weekend in May.
