Already reflecting on 2011...
WOW! It's been over a year since I visited this venting outlet, and I must say, it feels good to return, but it's sad to re-read my desperation. It's clear that one big thing keeping me from happiness was my job, or should I say, my inability to walk away from it, and putting it ahead of everything else and everyone. Sure, 10 years with a company is a long time, and you'd think that would account for something, but recently I was released of my duties. I won't go into the particulars, but after about $40 million in sales, $4 million in profits, and recently being the "Hero" of my district, it came down to them no longer wanting me as a part of their organization. Sure, I may have had a bad attitude sometimes, and been expressive about flaws in the company (only to make it stronger), but I continued to kill myself day-in, day-out, trying to improve and simplify processes, looking out for the best interest of my staff, and trying to grow our business, even when I wasn't sure how. I never intended to re-invent the wheel, but I was aware that it was loose, or maybe even broken at times, and really tried to find ways to fix it. In the end, it really didn't matter, because I was just another disposable employee, to a company who doesn't need "heroes" in their arsenal after all.
So, I'm now looking for other employment, with hopes of staying in the entertainment industry. At the turn of the new year, Heather said that 2011 was sure to bring change, as she moved to Coffeyville to pursue an HR generalist position. I knew my time in Hutchinson was long overdue, but I didn't have the cahones to move on. I can easily throw out the shoulda, woulda, coulda's, but a change is sure to come in the next couple months. Sure, I'll leave some great people and memories behind, but I hope to have left a legacy, or at least my stamp. Good or bad, people will remember me, the stories I told, the expectations I had, and the asshole boss I was, but also the caring friend I could be.
My buddy, Terrence recently said, "So life has moved you beyond the big green machine. The change will be fantastic for you."
I just really hope I don't make the same bad choices as I have in the past, and I can once again feel like an integral part of an organization who values my employment, and my opinion, so we can grow together. Cheesy, I know, but true. So, maybe 2011 will be the best thing since...
So, I'm now looking for other employment, with hopes of staying in the entertainment industry. At the turn of the new year, Heather said that 2011 was sure to bring change, as she moved to Coffeyville to pursue an HR generalist position. I knew my time in Hutchinson was long overdue, but I didn't have the cahones to move on. I can easily throw out the shoulda, woulda, coulda's, but a change is sure to come in the next couple months. Sure, I'll leave some great people and memories behind, but I hope to have left a legacy, or at least my stamp. Good or bad, people will remember me, the stories I told, the expectations I had, and the asshole boss I was, but also the caring friend I could be.
My buddy, Terrence recently said, "So life has moved you beyond the big green machine. The change will be fantastic for you."
I just really hope I don't make the same bad choices as I have in the past, and I can once again feel like an integral part of an organization who values my employment, and my opinion, so we can grow together. Cheesy, I know, but true. So, maybe 2011 will be the best thing since...
posted by K-Fleet at 11:17 AM
4 Comments:
Wow Kris,I'm so sorry to hear that. And shocked. You were one of the best managers I've worked with. But I totally understand what you're saying. Let's just say, I haven't stayed 17 yrs with this company because I feel so valued and appreciated. But I agree with Terrence, it's a blessing in disguise for you! Good luck and stay in touch.
Hopefully this will provide you the opportunity to find something you are not only good at (which you definitely were at Hastings) but also something you enjoy. Change is scary, but it is also exciting. Good luck in whatever you pursue.
Larry
Kris,
I just found this blog, and I have to tell you that you getting fired isn't all that surprising.
I worked with you at Hastings for a brief period of time. Not very long--but long enough to make me realize that retail is a bullshit career, something you failed to see until it was obviously too late.
Actually, to tell you the truth, I kind of liked you. You were quite the character, liking gangsta rap and all that. You were even a nice guy of sorts. But I could tell that you just didn't "get it," and judging from what I've read here, you still don't "get it."
It's actually funny (and a little sad) reading some of these blog posts. You wonder why they didn't hire you for the video buyer position; yet you wonder aloud if you should shave your stupid goatee? Really? Are you that fucking clueless?
I knew you weren't playing with a full deck when you told me you had a Bachelor's degree in Math, yet were working in retail. I always wondered about that(certainly someone with those credentials could find a better career field), until it became apparent that you didn't have a lot of self-confidence. This was evident in the way you let that stupid fucking Korean bitch (I forgot her name) push you around day after day, year after year.
Obviously I'm coming in late to the game, as this posting is over a year old as I write this. But dude, get some perspective and get the fuck out of retail.
Anonymous,
Thanks for the comment, and you're right, I do lack self-confidence. I didn't stay at Hastings because I loved retail, it was because I loved the product we carried. A Math degree isn't all that great, unless you want to teach or do statistics, which I don't, so I will continue to pursue other endeavors until I find one that's right. Thanks again! If you comment again, please leave your name so I know who you are.
Kris
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